Addicted To F**k It

REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY

A clever way to get someone to do what you want is to use a technique called reverse psychology. This is a clever way to get the unsuspecting other party to take on a task that they perhaps wouldn't have done otherwise. 

This sneaky kind of technique works especially well kids - it also works particularly well on me. I suspect the reason it works so well on me is because, like a child, I don't like being told what to do! So, if someone says 'I bet you can't do...' - there's a high chance that I'll do it. And if someone says 'you're mad if you do that, you're not 25 anymore, you could really hurt yourself' - It makes me want to do it more (Magavalanche is one recent example). 

Thing is, I really don't like being told that I can't do something but even more so, I don't like when others have been conditioned and therefore fearful or miss-informed - and they try and tell me I can't do something. So, time and again I will rebel to show them what can be possible. 

Sometimes, I know what I'm doing is wrong and potentially harmful - yet I do it anyway. It's this phenomena that I have identified as the 'F**k it addiction'. So it's not necessarily the activity or action itself where the enjoyment part is - but the rebellious aspect that I get a buzz from. 

I witnessed this trait in my best friend (us rebel types tend to stick together) last night when talking about the perils of smoking. He wants to get fit and yet he smokes - and has done so for 20 years. There's enough evidence to suggest that smoking can cause illness and also, affects heart & lung function - so best to avoid it if we want to get fit and increase probability of living to 100. Yet, when I mentioned giving up, he used his drinking/smoking nan (97) as an argument in defence of smoking and defiantly pulled another ciggy out of the box. On the packet was a picture of some poor soul with throat cancer and SMOKING KILLS printed in large bold type. If this message is supposed to deter people, it clearly isn't working for my friend. This, I believe is because he's a rebel. And that's why I tend to hang out with smokers - because they are the ones saying F**k it - and this is what they are silently saying every time they smoke!

Clearly, the tobacco companies know that their target market are rebels and although the government thinks this clear warning message is doing the job it needs to do - there's still a lot of smokers out there. 

So, in order to really get the right message across to these rebels, we need some other facts and messages to deter them. Therefore, I suggest we put out a message something like this: 'We get you addicted to the idea that you are being rebellious to make us rich - you are a mug' then smaller underneath - 'Smoking makes your breath and clothes smell, is an expensive habit which means you are a weak pussy if you can't give up. Why not find something else to spend your hard earned cash on....and it may mean you live longer too.' 

I'd be really interested to see one of those packets out there - I really think this truth will hit home a lot harder than the current message that has no impact with deterring my rebel friends. 

Power Hour

AN HOUR OF FOCUS

With the advancement of technology, there's so many more on-hand distractions in life that it can be easy to pass up on what's important and flick between FB updates, answer/delete emails switch or surf the internet instead.

If we want to really make any advances in life - we have to focus and commit to the task in hand. One way is to get up early in the morning before the day kicks in, turn off from any distractions and focus for one hour on doing something important like learning a language, instrument or writing a blog.

This time can be some of the most rewarding and beneficial in our lives, where anything can be achieved if we just stick to the rule of giving our full attention to just that one important thing for one hour per day.

Spirit Guides

POWER ANIMAL

For thousands of years, human beings have been on the quest to understand and discover the meaning of life. We've been looking to the stars, searching inside though the practice of meditation, following religious teachings and some seek their answers to life from palm readings or in the tea leaves.

This weekend I was with a friend who's taken a Shamanic course. Being a very spiritual type herself, I thought this particular course suited her well. I was also intrigued to learn more about this ancient practice and how it's ideas could help those who seem lost without any 'spiritual' guidance in modern society. 

Many cultures throughout time have had spiritual 'holy men', 'witch doctors' or 'Shaman' who are recognised to have a closer connection to a spirit world. A place of dreams where only these select few can interpret the strange goings on that most cannot find logical explanations for.

We tend to go to our GP or talk with friends and family about ailments, job issues, relationship concerns etc. but with a predominantly secular society in the UK, who can we go to for more spiritual help, guidance and soul healing. Maybe that is the reason why so many corners of London are now occupied by megaphone toting evangelical maniacs or leaflet/magazine pushers from all the major religions. It's likely that they're finding more and more lost souls. 

Spirit Guides

What I really liked about my first shamanic experience was that I got to meet up with my spirit guide. Whether it really was just my imagination making up the orange and blue snake that I talked with or there was some portal being opened up to me, the idea that I had a spirit guide creature looking out for me, left me feeling more secure and hopeful.

The dogma of organised religion has no appeal for me at all and so, like many others, I have my own very personal agnostic version of what spirituality means to me. And the idea of having someone who is very spiritually connected - a modern day Shamanic guide, being able to assist us on our journey through life - just as they have done in many other non-western cultures for millennia, does have an appeal for me. I can see this trend picking up more, maybe even becoming more integrated with the practice of Yoga, Qi Gong and other martial arts as a way to bring spirit, mind and body back into equilibrium. 

Quirky Cool

BE UNIQUE

Image is something we portray to the rest of the world. It's gets us attention - good or bad - and it's important to have one if we want to be remembered.

Dennis Rodman is an example of someone being very out-there with his look. Madonna obviously had a massive influence on him back in his rookie days when he took her advice 'image is everything' to new levels by stepping up on his wardrobe and body art transformations. 

So many of us are just trying to fit in. Many tend to go for very plain and uninteresting/non-fashion clothing/hair styles - that signals to others that they have little to offer with their creativity and maybe their personalities too. Others will follow a trend that appears to be adorned by the fashionably cool trendsetters of which they want to be associated with - to better help bolster their own unimaginative image presence and cover up for any insecurities they may have.

One such trend at the moment is to wear new jeans with a purpose made rip in the knees. I've seen it everywhere over the last year and it's now become so prevalent that I find it really hard to believe so many would want to be seen to be like sheep following a trend that has really become so untrendy. 

It's odd that just having a couple of rips in jeans, no matter what the variation is, can be all that's needed to make someone feel like they are making a statement or adversely, easily fitting in to an established trend. It was Malcolm Gladwell in his book 'The Tipping Point', that highlighted the phenomena of having the masses who pick up on trends after the Maverns and early adopters have taken something unique and quirky which then becomes mainstream. This rip trend, which re-surfaces from time to time - has surely long surpassed the stages of the early adopters and yet shows no signs of waning...

We can't all be be trend-setters but we can still be different in our own unique way to avoid being lost as the herd. This is why having a constant assessment on ones image is essential if we wish to remain out-there as one of the truly inspirational and quirky-cool mavericks. 

Old Fashioned Fun

THE LAST BASTION

Some places never change. And that can be a great thing if you just want to go somewhere you know and love like the Palm Tree pub in the east end of London or The White Heart pub in Truro.

Both of these venues offer a beautiful venue that hasn't had the soul sucked out of it through modernisation, aren't trying to be a restaurant and consistently lay on the same great friendly service and entertainment that they do well week after week. 

That entertainment might mean a jazz band with the same antiquated musicians & singers or DJ playing the same 80's and 90's tracks - but if what it offers makes us smile, tap our feet or dance up a storm - making the old feel young again and bringing all generations together for a night of good old fashioned fun - then it's got to be fully recognised for this fantastic achievement - and being one of only a few remaining places to survive the test of time.  

We really have to be thankful to these publicans like Gary & Brenda for their 17 years of dedication and give them our support where we can by turning up, drinking a bit too much, hugging strangers and dancing like it's 1999.

Eco Living

SUSTAINABLE ABODES

Living in the 21st Century is going to see a lot more focus on sustainable living. Environmental changes will encourage us to search for cleaner, renewable energy resources and the quest for finding better, more ecological ways for living will transform all of our lives.

There's been so much media attention on what the necessary changes are over the last 30 years - and yet, there appears to be little advancement on how we're going to achieve any of this. It feels like the same mindset that potentially destroyed civilisation on Easter Island is here in the 21st century - namely, civilisation out of control, contributing even more greenhouse gasses, toxic waste and magnifying the problems to a point of no return.

Looking at some of the proposed alternative houses available out there - there seems to be a complete failure to understand what we are going to need for the common good, as is evident from this article on The Telegraph's website. What we need, are affordable houses - that are ecologically efficient - and we need to start creating them to live in very soon.

So what's stopping us from making more affordable energy-efficient homes? The idea that we have to compromise on our contemporary modes of living are what's holding us back - as people are generally mis-informed about what an eco-home can be. The other issue facing us, is the cost of the land and the focus on making money pushing up prices far beyond what is affordable by the masses.

The UK government owns a massive £330 billion of land and property which has land suitable for housing development. If an initiative could be introduced that segments off parts of the country for community-style permaculture living, we could see a change in how people live - as they adopt a lower-cost lifestyle and over time, eventually adapt to a truly sustainable style of living.

Leadership

FOLLOW OR FOLLOWED

For the greatest rewards in life - be the one who others follow. Stay true to your beliefs, set an example for the possible and be the one who people chose to seek for advice and guidance. It takes a lot of courage and determination to push through when others would fail - but being the living proof that you can succeed against the odds will help others to see where they can also also achieve great things with their lives.

Shared Accommodation

A HOME FROM HOME

On a wet and busy Saturday in Cornwall - right in the middle of the summer school holidays, finding a decent, good value place to stay can be difficult to get last minute. That's where my first experience of airbnb came in.

Air BnB is relatively new and the opportunity for us all to discover something a bit different, is now literally right there in the palm of our hands! I look forward to making the most of this power to select great places to stay in the very near future..

BBH - New Zealand
A forum for finding and staying in peoples homes is nothing new, as I recall from my own fantastic experience travelling around New Zealand back in 2000. In 2015, with the internet being so prevalent and easy to find interesting places to stay, BBH still has an extensive listing of quirky places to explore staying at in New Zealand. It's arguably still the most established and largest of it's kind in New Zealand, with carefully chosen, quirky properties to stay at - all graded by the people staying there. With Air BnB now also on offer, this will offer even more chances to find those special places - travelling off the beaten track has never been so exciting.

All in all, I loved my travels back in 2000. it was a great experience that I'd happily take again given the opportunity. Looking back the places I stayed at and seeing them still featured in the top 80-100% top listings, I'm pleased for the owners that they've managed to retain such consistency. The top listing is still at the top even today - that's a real feat! Hopewells, Marlborough Sounds, NZ deserves to be at the top - it was an amazing place.

Make The Last Moments Special

FINISHING ON AN UP

No matter how good an experience is, the lasting memory will always be based on the latter moments from that experience - be that a night out on the town or a week's summer holiday.

If it's just a night out, the final moments can be marred by simply having a poor experience getting home at the end of the evening. But provided the night's been a success in every other way, having a blip at the end merely diminishes a tiny fraction off of an otherwise brilliant time spent in enjoyment and experienced within just very recent memory. But on longer periods like a week, earlier good points will be already diminished in memory over the days that follow and the period of lasting memory will be built up from the later section of the trip.

So if you're planning on doing something on a final night of a trip - make sure it's something really special to better cement the recollection of the entire trip as something you'd want to remember.

Carry on Camping

MOBILE HOME IN A BAG

Taking to the roads this week, we packed the car with our camping gear and headed for some of the most beautiful places in the south coast - Dorset, Devon and Cornwall.

No-Go Bongo
The original plan had been to take a trip down to my friend's place and buy his used Bongo Friendee but it had a serious engine problem and meant a costly repair. So, we decided to take our Mercedes for a 900 mile spin and see what adventures we could make for ourselves in this old convertible.

Who needs a camper or caravan when you have a tent?
Overtaking so many caravans and looking at the options for mobile homes - dull looking camp sites with dull looking people staying there too. We opted for the hidden little farms and quirky places with no electric points, hence no RV's - where only a tent could make the most of these gems. So while the weather was mixed and the initial thoughts were for the confines of the pop-up roof of the campervan to make our luxury sleeping quarter, it actually worked out better for many reasons.

It's so easy to pitch up and make a temporary home from a compact folding abode. Buying tents that pitch in minutes, ones that you can stand up in, others with porches, or seating areas and multiple sleeping quarters - all for very little money these days, means the home is where you make it.

Having a few essentials like a decent sleeping bag and the odd luxury like a pillow or blow-up mattress, means the night's sleep can be just as comfortable as back at home. And gone are the days that going camping means packing up the car to the max - because even if there's a bit of equipment required that we don't have, or can't improvise with - an Argos or Halfords is never too far away. And choosing these national outlets mean, should an item not life up to its standards, it can be replaced easily at any branch within a year. Having the tent meant we paid £6 each per night - leaving far more of the budget to spend in the local pubs and fine eateries too.

Experience Rules

LEADERSHIP

It takes a certain type of person to be a good leader. Experience is one major factor but confidence in one's ability to lead others in a positive way - in order to bring out the best in less experienced others - that's the mark of being a truly great leader.

No Love Lost
Staying at certain venues over the last week, it was clear where leadership was either the gel in making a successful establishment or absence the failure. Junior, inexperienced staff, left to manage the best they could on their own, with no experienced mentor helping to steer these mostly nice but ineffective youngsters along, meant that I had to give my second review (as positively as I could) on an establishment that promised so much and yet failed to deliver. Not that this had a really negative effect on our stay - it was just a bit disappointing on our 11 year anniversary to have stayed somewhere with love in it's name - that ironically, felt so unloved.

Life's Co-Pilot

TWO IS BETTER THAN ONE

It's a tough gig - life. There's ups and downs along the way and having someone around who's sharing the chores, helping with the problems and got your back when the sh*t goes down - is the most prized treasure we can have to make life's roller coaster as enjoyable a ride as possible. 

Having a significant other to share good times with - hug when you wake in the morning and kiss before you sleep at night, makes it all worthwhile.

Sticking it out 

Today is our 11 year anniversary. Who'd have thought that one quick drink on a Tuesday night after work could have led to (5 pints of Guinness and a bottle of wine each!) such a long lasting and successful partnership. 

This year has been a ground-breaker for us both as we focus on taking control of our days and making use of the time to better prepare us for the next 11 years and beyond. 

Lessons in Survival

ALWAYS PREPARED

Being able to survive away from a city life should be something everyone has available to draw on in a time of need. Taking trips with the scouts or girl guides as a child are the first-step foundations for self-survival. I for one, loved making a camp, finding the right wood to make a fire and being able to live outside in a leaf bivvy should the need arise. These skills can be some of the best a 13 year old boy will learn for bolstering self confidence later in life. I fondly remember watching a programme with Lofty Wiseman and Peter Duncan where they survived eating insects and it inspired me to take a course in survival many years later. I always have a copy of the SAS survival handbook to hand on a camping trip even today!

It's interesting to see more families taking an interest in sustainable living and watching this reality TV show about escaping to the wild was an inspiration for me to brush up on the skills I learned at our most famous head scout Ray Mears', Bushman Survival week a few years ago.

On The Up

HIDDEN GEMS

If you are looking for a great place to stay and eat while on your travels, some of Britain's history-rich country Inns are arguably amongst the best in the world for offering friendly service, comfortable accommodation and sumptuous fare. 

Driving through quaint villages on medieval coach roads - long since used as major routes and passed over by the masses on busy motorways, these long-standing abodes are the little gems where that bit of magic awaits those who venture out along the roads less travelled. 

The Roads To Discovery

There's something very special about that feeling we get, stumbling across a new place never visited or known about before. Having a 'discovery' moment is up there as one of my greatest feelings as it ignites the adventurer spirit in me. It's not that these ancient places haven't been around for hundreds of years before hand, but the feeling that you've 'found' this special place - a diamond in the rough, a sanctuary for the weary in that time of need - feeds a satisfaction that expectations can never deliver. 

Great Expectations

When something is really good - the hardest thing possible is to keep it consistently up there. Renowned chefs like Gordon Ramsey, who are furiously working at very high levels under close scrutiny, will vouch for this. The fact is, very few can keep to these sustained levels, especially in the food and hospitality industry. There are just too many variables to consider and it's almost impossible to deliver consistently over and over again, keeping everyone happy all of the time. That's why discovery delivers positive results over expectation fro delivery the vast majority of the time. 

Up and over

The places that I consider to be the best - are either those that offer such good value for their modestly understated excellence (like a simple cafe called Pumblechooks in Wapping does consistently well) or those that are working fervently towards it and therefore deserve accolade for their passion attaining it. These are the the 'UP' or the 'ON THE UP' places that we seek. 

Diminishing returns

Because I find the thrill of discovery so rewarding, I refrain from going back to the same places for fear of diminishing a special memory. There's so many new discoveries to be made, why be lazy and relive something that can't possibly deliver the same or better quality as first experienced? 

There are exceptions to the rule however - and these places just have something that much more to give, that they can be visited 2, 3 or more times without losing their appeal - but they are very rare. One such place that we love, is The Kings Arms in Hurley. An Inn located near Winchester, steeped in British history, connected to Cromwell and royalty. 

However, as with many great discoveries, they eventually get discovered by the masses. They peak to greatness and eventually fall to complacency - and hence, the magic inevitably diminishes. It's strange, but you can actually feel the spark has gone the moment you arrive in a diminishing 'UP AND OVER' place, as we did today. Under new management means on this occasion that the person holding the magic has moved on to pastures new. It's saddening but as a chapter closes on this once great place, the quest for discovering an exciting new 'UP' place begins once again. 

LImiting Choice

LETTING FATE TAKE A HAND

There are so many options available to us in this modern age. With the Internet, it's become increasingly easy to discover new places and things to see & do. This means that good places are listed for all to see and hidden gems remain hidden no more. 

Finding a place to go during peak holiday times such as the weekend when the kids break up from school, can be neigh on impossible to those unwilling to look hard enough. On these busy times, main routes are chock-full as hoards of families take to the roads. Accommodation has already been pre-booked up in advance and finding anywhere to stay last minute near a beach is a no-go zone in the UK. 

This is the time when I like to leave the decisions to fate. As I for one, like to include an element of adventure and spontaneity in my travels that most cannot stomach - particularly at these most busy times of year. I always have a tent in the car just in case, but there is always a hidden little gem - a cancellation, a discount for last minute or a quiet, picturesque place to stay, just a short distance from the hot-spots where one can enjoy the serenity of nature and a breakfast in solitude watching the wildlife go about their day.

Micro climates in Dorset

THE MAGIC OF DORSET

One of the biggest mysteries is how parts of Dorset can have such idyllic weather when all around it is cold and wet. The Square and Compass in Dorset is one of my favourite places to visit and through some strange magic - always seems to be in the sunshine. Can the alleged world domination by the Mason's really extend to controlling the weather too...can't be all bad if you're enjoying a pie and pint at this great British pub.

Road trips

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

Taking a ride along roads to places new can be likened to roads of discovery in other areas of our life too. Having time to think as the world passes us - moving away from home, work – leaving our worries behind, allows new thoughts to open up and bring about a freer state of being. This was the idea behind the mind-altering trip that the Merry Pranksters took in their bus way back at the start of the hippy revolution in 1964. Those heady psychedelic days may now be gone, but the open road is still there for another kind of mind-altering trip.

Looking for any evidence to support the happiness I feel when I'm on the road, I can only find religious references. It's interesting that so much is put on discovery of religion but little comes up on self discovery through travel. The closest I have found is through reading The Art of Travel by Alain Botton - although, he ventures further afield to find himself through travel and art. Yet, simply whizzing along in a car is largely overlooked in this profound book for having any life epiphanies take place and it really can be that simple.

When those poor lost souls 'discover' religion, they are moving from their current 'place' or state of mind - where they are weighed down with all their life baggage - to a newer place in their minds where they feel the merits of discovery in the form of religion. It's all merely a state of mind - can't they see that? So, I'd concede that this same baggage-dropping state can equally be found by going on a journey to new places in a car.

The very act of driving means we are constantly in the moment - checking the road situation, reading signs, maps, gauges. It's a form of meditation in itself - especially so on those long trips that demand extended periods of concentration. For a passenger, it's a very confronting state as the responsibility for safety is on the driver. This allows all other thoughts to flow through the mind and this is where we can practice the art of observing these thoughts as they pass in front of us - choosing which ones to listen to and take action on.

This quality time can prove to be the best for making tough life decisions and is a place for coming to the realisation that whatever baggage we've 'left' behind, can even be left behind on our return from being on the road to discovery.

Spreading The Word

THE WORD OF TRUTH

38º is the angle that snowflakes come together to form an avalanche. It's also a metaphor. People coming together to make a change is what democracy is all about. Without the means to make a difference, we turn away. Through media channels like 38degrees.org.uk we can get our opinions heard and protect the nation from being governed or poorly run by our politicians. All it takes is for more people to act and speak up, contact their MEP's and make a stand for their beliefs.

The time now is easier than ever before to make a change. All we have to do is factor-in a small amount of time in our days to read, sign and spread the word to our friends, family and loved ones via social media. Without this, we stand to lose what we hold dear and what defines us as a nation, our freedom as individuals and our rights as human beings.

We All Need A Little Help

DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK

We can't be masters of everything we do and we aren't always the best placed person to make the right decisions.

If there's something we need help with, many people would rather convince themselves that they can handle a situation rather than seek help. This is even more the case when it comes to discussing our personal life with an advisor or professional therapist.

We could all do with opening up a bit more to discuss our concerns, worries and dilemmas. It's good to talk. Yet, a lot of us - especially men, will never admit to having a weakness, preferring to bottle up their feelings, where they fester away, until they can't be contained any more.

It's really ok to speak with an expert but if we just can't make that step - the next best solution is to write our feelings down. The very act of writing, will help to purge the thoughts that are making us feel anxious, fearful and vulnerable. And when these words are out there, they can be measured and action taken to fix the issues or the much needed help can be sought after. 

Battling Fear

FACING DOWN OUR FEARS

Fear is a very powerful emotion. When fear rises up in us it can take over all other thoughts and render us helpless. Overcoming these fears can be very tough to face up to, but simply 'removing ourselves' from the thoughts, by using a breathing meditation technique, where we can observe the thoughts as they happen, we can then see them for what they are - just thoughts.

While driving down to the South of France this weekend, I became very fearful. I was about to compete in the Megavalanche race which is a crazy downhill mountain bike event full of multiple hazards and potential for injury or death. I have been in many situations before on mountains where there is potential for such injury - but I've been younger, fitter, stronger physically and more experienced. Mountain biking is something I understand the physics of, know what the equipment is capable of but something I have only a small experience of doing and certainly not in a competitive arena before. I was beating myself up. Why am I doing this at 43, what am I trying to prove, do I want to risk being out of work or paralysed, will my girlfriend leave me, where will I get the money to pay the bills, how will I look to my friends when I can't do the race or if I'm airlifted off the mountain?

Nobody knew I was having these thoughts. I was entertaining them coming and going as I engaged in other conversations with my friends. And when I got a quiet moment, I switched over to being the observer in my head and just witnessed all the fear, paranoia and misery fight for attention. I actually found it quite amusing seeing these multiple facets of my mind being so blindly assured of their states of being, yet here I was, completely calm hearing them out until they exhausted themselves and went quiet. How refreshing to see these thoughts for what they are. They aren't who I truly am and by rising above them, they don't define me but merely fire off for a bit and then disappear.

When it came to the day to qualify and race - I was completely calm and ready. My self confidence and trust in my abilities were restored to the point where I managed to gain a lot of ground on the others in my race. And had I not gotten a puncture, would have put in a really good time, I'm sure. It's likely I'll compete again in the future but even if I don't, I know I have what it takes and this mindset and the technique for tackling fear can be applied to anything we do in life.

Observation
There are many techniques for facing up to our fears. Understanding where they come from through getting to know ourselves better will really help. To really fight them takes a lot of courage. Practicing the technique of removing oneself from fearful thoughts by observing as a third person as Geoff explains in this video, was something I'd heard spoken to me before, but suddenly appeared as a revelation this time I heard it. Once again I'm amazed at the timing that Geoff's wisdom comes through to me.

This video arrived in my inbox the day after my races and confirmed what I already learned to be true. Hearing these wise words from Geoff, who has been spending many years training and learning these observation plus other self mastery techniques, made me feel really pleased at my progress over the last 6-7 months. I've grown as a person in such a short period of time. And this is something we are all capable of achieving if we desire and allow it to happen.

Fear should not be given the power to take a hold of us. But by being courageous and harnessing this powerful emotion correctly, we can use this force to make us stronger and elevate us towards further greatness.

The Robot Human

MANAGING THE MACHINE

We are biological robots. We start off in this world with basic programming which we learn to master with the help of our parents. We then have other children and teachers at school to top-up the learning process and eventually we are set free to take this programmed human being out into the wider world where we bolt on our own extra software enhancements to make us capable of functioning in society. 

The Robot v Human

Knowing how and when to operate in the rational, logical programme mode is essential to getting on with other people in every day situations. We have been programmed to act a certain way from a very young age. Being polite, patient and considerate to others has been instilled - hard-coded in. It is not a natural trait to be unselfish and hence why we engage our practised mind to make us act correctly for better coping around others - especially in a work environment. We become like a programmed robot.

The problem with always having a pre-thought programme running, is that we never really get to enjoy the moment we're in. Allowing the times for us to be in a more 'child-like' curious, adventurous and creative state will enable us to have a freedom to be with others in a much more free state of being. And if we've given enough time to develop the robot, or rational side of our brains, we can be assured that the underline robot mind will stop us from coming too far out of our playful state to cause any harm to ourselves or others. It's essentially having the robot/parent state set up in a way that allows us to live as humans - playful, inquisitive and fun beings that we are.

Alpe D'Huez Megavalanche

THE HILLS ARE ALIVE

The mountains hold something special for me and many others that flock to these magnificent peaks for clean air, views, walks and adrenalin-fuelled sports. 

Downhill mountain biking

It's pretty crazy what some people will do for their kicks - like hurtling down a mountain on a bike. Yet, there is something so invigorating about speeding over rocks and through twisting, dusty, bumpy bends with serious injury or death just inches/moments away. Some of the kids today make it look very easy...

Resetting the brain

Concentrating hard on which line to take and focussing intently on the terrain, we leave our bodies to work at the best of it's ability - we enter the flow state. It's like a kind of meditation. All other thoughts leave the mind and stay out of our thoughts for many hours and sometimes days after the ride. And if there's been any negativity or depressing thoughts before the ride - they are banished and the mind becomes reset for a time, certainly until the inevitable return from the sanctuary that is The Alps. 

Coming Of Age

GROWING PAINS

Today I'm reminded of how difficult the transition from being a boy to becoming a man really is. The teen years are some of the toughest moments in our life. As it's when we make the decisions that shape us into the adults we then become and being a mentor to a young boy or girl to help them make the transition is a position of great responsibility which can be very rewarding when it goes well. 

Playing The Game
There's a lot of conflict with our teachers, parents and peers as some of the bad decisions being made steer us towards dangerous or illegal and stupid acts. It's at these times that we learn how to deal with conflict, take responsibility for our actions and earn the respect of adults for making the tough move from being a protected child to a self-sufficient adult.

We're all still the child inside and although it may seem like a long way off, we are all still capable of being in that same child state, making the same stupid decisions and getting into trouble. Becoming an adult is all about learning how to play the game of life for our advantage without hurting others or getting into trouble. Some never learn how to do this.

We forget that there's only a few key life skills separating us from being that 13 year old kid so when we're confronted with someone going through that same tricky transition we've already passed through successfully, we may be a little forgetful of how tricky and sometimes painful it was and just need to be aware that it's not actually much of a difference between us man and boy. We have to try and remember that we made mistakes too - a lot of mistakes.

I don't ever recall being told that the teenage years are a tricky period that I've got to work out for myself - I just remember the chiding when I got it wrong. Dealing with young adults at this hormone-rich and growth spurt period can be really tough - so it pays to get some tips on how best to deal with these changelings so it doesn't end up being a shouting match between two raging adolescents.

Run For The Hills

THE IDEAL MAN SPA

It's a bit of a generalisation to say that women like to be pampered more than men, but for me, the idea of a spa weekend is not something I'd ever do with a group of male friends. Not to say I don't like a massage or a Jacuzzi - it's just that men don't really know how to really look after themselves in that regard and if they ever do go to a spa - it's not really discussed with their mates. Again, I'm generalising. But....this weekend, I've realised what an ideal spa break for me is. A trip to the mountains for some life-threatening activities, followed by death-cheating celebratory drinking filled with many moments of laughter.

It's amazing how much clarity of thought you can get after really concentrating on not hurting yourself up a mountain - all other worries and concerns are pushed right out of the mind. It's the exhilaration and thrill of doing something potentially dangerous with your friends with a bit of competition thrown in and banter in the pub afterwards that make my man-spa weekends. And for a bit of conventional spa treatment - booking in at a spa hotel like the Grandes Rousses Hotel where we stayed, means theres even a jacuzzi to relax in too.

Risk Management

THE INSURANCE MINEFIELD

In a connected modern world, we're increasingly being measured through the medium of probability and data analytics. With insurance policies, our risk levels are being assessed with complicated algorithms made up from big data collected and analysed from across the globe.

There's a measure of risk in everything we do. Driving, travelling and partaking in adrenalin sports. All have their own specific risk factors and therefore a quote will need to be worked out for the individual based on certain factors. We're encouraged to get life cover for taking out mortgages and accident cover for lost income but if we add up all the different insurance cover we have, it amounts to a lot of money. Why is there no single insurance for everything we do? Simple answer - because insurance as it turns out, has made some of the richest men in history and created massive empires for those who have controlled the money markets. All based on fear and carefully considered figures worked out to balance against how much we're prepared to pay for countering against potential loss.

Barter, Trade & Coffee Houses 
Insurance history dates back to very early human society. But it was likely the 17th century and around the time of The Great Fire of London, when the first modern property insurance companies were set up. It was allocating fire fighting agencies to protect their insured property, that the insurance industry has seen it's greatest changes and commenced a period for making a great deal of money for the people that run these organisations. 

RSA or Royal Sun Alliance, has been around in its earliest guise since 1710 and Nathan Mayer Rothschild, who had a stake in the early Sun Alliance from 1824, was an astute financier who as legend tells it, made a fortune from the stock market by creating panic after the battle of Waterloo to buy back shares at rock bottom prices. Nathan was reputedly a very calculated character who built up such massive wealth and power that he was able to supply enough coin to the Bank of England, so to avoid a liquidity crises. The Rothschild dynasty is still influencing the global banking industry 200 years on.

Business insurance also saw a boom in the late 1600's with the emergence of coffee shops where stock and insurance deals were settled. Lloyds insurance started out as a coffee shop, where deals setting insurance for ships carrying cargo were brokered and Jonathan's Coffee House formed the early location of the London Stock Exchange.

With natural disasters and lawsuits taking great chunks from insurance firms in recent years - almost bringing to collapse one of the oldest mutual insurers, Equitable Life, insurance policies have become much more of a minefield to navigate. When considering taking out an insurance policy, everything needs to be thoroughly checked. Not reading the small print could mean that if and when a claim is to be made - the right kind of cover may not be in place. This is something I found when checking through my travel policy before travelling abroad this weekend.

I'm travelling to The Alps for some alpine riding which I thought was in my policy. But it's a different 'kind' of riding and therefore, I was not covered for full European medical cover should I need an airlift off a mountain, and my bike, my mobile phone and my iPad are not covered too on this travel policy either. This meant I had to pay an extra amount for three bolt-on premiums which was the equivalent of paying half again what I pay for annual travel insurance. Although I hope I won't ever need to use insurance - the genius in how these companies now work is that in many cases, you have to get cover in order to travel, drive, take out a mortgage or take part in adrenalin sports - but maybe one day, everything will be contained in just one policy. Until that day comes, check the small print!

Power To The People

CITIZENS UNITE

Fast going are the days when the power elite could sway the masses through spin pushed out in the newspapers and in TV. 

Now, through the Internet and social media, we have the opportunity to have our voices heard. We can make our own videos, connect and share information with the world and through our own research, educate ourselves to make our minds up what is right and wrong. 

A recent political initiative that has been opposed by communities in the north of England, has today been stopped. The stand against fracking. This is a significant move for the people of this country and marks what I believe to be a move towards true democracy. A place where the people can see that their opinions matter. 

Thankfully, we all still have the power to force the government and the agencies motivated by greed, to divulge the information we need to see before political decisions are made. It's thanks to Greanpeace and other defenders of the people who fight to protect our environment that we will now know the original content of the research document on fracking before it was edited to make fracking seem more appealing. 

There's many instances where this kind of underhand behaviour has been used before and this will be the last time it will happen so easily, I'm sure. I feel that maybe the people of the USA have a bigger battle on their hands as the corporations really do have so much power but it is still possible if they can see what has happened in this country today - they'll know that it's possible. 

By donating a small amount of money and time, we can all help save the environment, empower local communities, see an end to corruption and put the power back into the rightful hands of the worlds citizens - away from corporations and puppet politicians. 

Even The Greatest Minds Slip Up

WE ARE ONLY HUMAN

We cannot be perfect all the time. Don't be so hard on yourselves! Even the great sages slip up. The most inspirational of people like Ghandi, Mandella and even Jesus, have all strayed from the path.

Every day, we make decisions, which, based on our temperament, can be poorly executed through lack of sleep, hunger, stress and factors out of our control. 

The key is to recognise when anger, frustration and negative emotions are affecting decisions and those around us and try to make a correction or apologise for our unwarranted behaviour.

Making a note of the times when we are clearly not at our best and identifying why these behaviours have occurred, can help us to better manage moods and unlock hidden stressors that are the catalysts for any sharp, reactionary emotional outbursts. 

We should take these moments as a positive - because, it's when we see what underlines these behaviours that we can act and make the greatest improvements for personal growth.  

Sports Day

TAKING PART

Watching the 4 year olds compete at their first sports day today, seeing the joy on the parent's faces as their kids crossed the line with their spoon and bean bag, I witnessed first hand how powerful these defining moments are in a child's life. 

So, while it is encouraged to cheer on every child for taking part at these events, it was evidently very difficult to conceal the excitement from the mums and dads as their somewhat bewildered child took the line as a winner and immense relieve certain parents expressed as their child trotted in away from last place. 

Winners

It was a wonderfully amusing and at the same time very human base-level, survival spectacle which will have imprinted something on that child's character that will either give them a solid foundation of self confidence or, if we're not careful, a fear of failure. We put so much importance on winning as it's a survival instinct built in to our genetic makeup. Nowhere more so than the kids sports day, do we see these human traits in their rawest form. But if we remove the competitive element, what do we gain from watching some exercise in the park?

Even if we try and kid ourselves that it's just the taking part, seeing your child take the line and pick up a gold medal in front of all the other class mates, teachers and parents, is a defining moment not only for parents but in that child and every other child's development one way or other - either a mark for already having success, achieving success again or a measure to strive for success in the future.

Mum & Dad

ANNIVERSARIES

Today was my mum and dad's 43rd anniversary. That's a long time sharing a life together, bringing up kids and ultimately looking after each other. Having a stable family environment means so much - especially for the sake of the children. Studies are showing that children from broken families have a higher chance of becoming involved in crime or can suffer mental disorders throughout their life. 

Who knows where I would have ended up if it weren't for having decent parents and a stable family life. So it's thanks to them for being so strong together that I'm able to be the person I am today. 

It's also why spending as much time with them as possible, particularly celebrating their success on making such a monumental occasion, their anniversary, happen every year. Because what are we without our mum & dad. It's a day to be truly celebrated.

Golden Ray Days

TAKE A DAY OFF

If we count the days that we potentially have available to spend basking in the sunshine, we will see that there is only a finite number remaining. That's not meant to be morbid - just realistic. There's no guarantee that tomorrow will come. But at 43, with my grandparents living up until their late 80's, I may be fortunate enough to get the same number of summers again.

And if like me, you live and work in a country where the weather can be fairly cool and as unpredictable as the UK is - there won't be many chances where you can truly enjoy the best times of the day to bask in the sun. It's rare that we get the chance. Unless you count the paltry hour's lunch break in the 9-5 job, the odd weekend when the planets align for a sunny spell or the week's holiday roasting in scorchio Spain. That's if you're lucky enough to get abroad for a proper break in a sunny climate.

Life's too short

It really is. So why miss out on those golden days when they come along?  Do whatever you have to do. Take that time for yourself. The world will keep turning regardless. Down tools for just one day. 

Lied to your boss? Faked a stomach bug? A family crises? Whatever it is that got you there - kicking back on a random day in the middle of the week, warmed by the glorious sunshine, sipping a cold one and grabbing life before it passes you by - this is living. Relax - your conscious can take it! 

Penniless

A WORLD WITHOUT MONEY

Imagine having a different currency other than £$€¥ etc. A monetary value or credit based on your output and value of that contribution in relation to the whole it represents. A fair and just system with little disparity. Hard to imagine how that works in today's society, isn't it?

If the importance is placed on the things that really matter and an hour of my time is relative to an hour of your time providing we benefit each other. So, how much would my pretty marketing leaflet I've produced be worth to the person who grows the food? Nothing...unless he wants to promote his farm maybe...

A World Obsession

Money makes the world go round, so the saying goes and without it there will be pandemonium. Look at what's happening in Greece - and soon Spain and Ireland? There's a crises going on and money is at the root of it. And just because the situation is over there, doesn't mean it won't affects things over here too - as we're all completely caught up in it. Money buys food and puts a roof over our heads. So without it, there's a real dilemma on our hands. But maybe there's another way?

Questioning the value of money
in 2000, Daniel Suelo quit his job, left the last of his money in a phone box and started to live life in the wilderness. Foraging for food, eating roadkill and picking up everything else he could need from dumpsters or collected through donations, he has since been writing a regular blog on the virtues of being free from money and living a more meaningful existence. 

The Hadza people of Tanzania have been living a simple nomadic hunter/gatherer life for millennia and while this type of existence is very extreme, they have immense freedom from the worries that weigh on us in our western society.

Self-sufficient living
Many communities are now turning to permaculture as a way to substantiate a life of self-sufficiency. By understanding the natural ecosystems and working closely together within these communities, people are discovering better ways to live harmonious and holistic lives at one with nature. And this isn't just restricted to isolated hippy groups any more either, but seems to have taken off in traditionally working class communities in run down areas of northern England - as they can now provide for themselves by growing their own food, build ecological housing and harness renewable energy instead of having to rely upon the state to provide their means.