Say What You Do - Do What You Say

BIG TALK

How many times in our lives have we said we're going to do something and failed to deliver on it? Many times for sure - because talk is cheap. We often talk on autopilot and a lot of the time we don't even realise we're doing this. So, to deliver on what we're saying, we really need to be more mindful of what we are saying and what we can stick to. 

Focussing On The Moment

The worst time to have a conversation is when the mind is occupied with another task. If one attempts to engage in a conversation at the same time as performing another task, the mind disengages from comprehension and retention of information, In a compromised state, the person multi-tasking will likely agree to anything that's put to them - often to a disadvantage. Many have gotten wise to this fact and why distraction is often used as a tool for ensuring consent to desired plans.

It's easy to respond to questions without thinking through what it is we really want to say first. It's also really easy to talk 'twaddle' - mindless small talk. Sometimes it can feel like the part of the brain responsible for talking, is acting completely on it's own accord. One may get told by partners that they have said something - with no recollection of saying it. This mindfulness problem will get multi-tasker in a lot of trouble! I've personally caught myself mid-stream agreeing to a task, when I knew full well I was not going to be able to commit to it. 

Some falsely believe they can multitask. The reality is, that tasks can be taken on simultaneously, but all will be compromised. We all really need to focus on what we're doing, including having a meaningful conversation. This means completely averting energies on other tasks, making eye contact, and then thoughtfully considering exactly what is being discussed before agreeing to something that needs to be carried through with mutual agreement. 

The Morning Schedule

A good example of where the focus on communication has started to work, comes with one's commitment to the morning schedule. A group of us called the 5am club has been committing to an exercise routine for some time now. Qi Gong, planks, press-ups and physio exercises every day before breakfast. Sometimes, however, a late night with friends, a few too many drinks and not enough food, means the early start and physical exertion becomes more of a challenge - a good excuse you'd think, for changing plans. Not any more. Previously, one of us would decide that they wanted to stay in bed longer or skip the exercises. This was becoming a difficult situation because we'd take turns to break the rules so much that there was no routine and the group was beginning to disintegrate.

The solution was to have a meaningful conversation the night before and mutually agree on a plan for the following day. If there was a good enough reason for a time change - then fine, we'd make the adjustment, but under no circumstances was the chain going to be broken by not sticking to the routine. 

Seinfeld's 'Chain' Strategy

There's been a few people laying claim to this simple but effective technique, which is essentially just making a plan and sticking to it - like writing something in a blog every day or doing 3x 2 minute planks and 50 continuous press-ups - even with a hangover. 

Integrity Rules

Each time we make 'pacts' within groups, with family, friends, partners and with ourselves, we need to be aware that breaking this contract, also damages our integrity. If this continues, the ability to stick to plans, and firm up beliefs and ability to stay on the path of truth, becomes weakened. Our moral compass lowers. 

Staying true to our word and starting from plans made the evening before, with actions taken the following morning – will aid us in creating healthy habits and positive lifestyle changes.