Life Savers

GUARDIANS

We all have it in us to be life savers and look out for those in need of rescue. It just takes a bit of awareness to really see when someone needs help and willingness for action help when we can. It's all about the act of being on one's guard and looking out for others' safety & wellbeing.

Caring for another's wellbeing is what our parents have naturally always done. We in turn have a duty to protect our ageing parents and look out for our siblings and the rest of the family. In marriage, it's written into the contract of matrimony to look out for one another 'til death do us part. It's an expected responsibility in everyone's life, to give help where it's needed.

On Point
In military terms, someone 'On Point' means they are at the front line of combat. They are the first to come under enemy fire and need to be in a heightened state of awareness in order to 'get the backs' of their fellows. Their job is ultimately to protect and hold their position.

Badge of Honour
There's obvious situations when this role is called for, ie. when there's potential danger or when specialist skills are required that some are better equipped to draw on than others. But there are other situations where an unexpected event has occurred and a life saving duty is required. If there's a 'man down', someone has to step-up and 'be the metal' - the life saver. It's an honourable thing to do - often taken instinctively without thoughts for one's own wellbeing. Military heroes take action in these defining moments because they have the extra resources to do what needs to be done and can act on them when it's realised others do not and will suffer. These acts are rewarded with medals.

Unsung Hero
Life saving instances are not just witnessed on the front line of battle in military scenarios, they are all around us in every day situations. It's found at work and in relationships but rarely is it seen in the same light as in the military. There are no medals. 'Having someone's back' behaviours are often played out in everyday life without any recognition. Someone might just be termed as extra helpful, reliable or dependable. This in itself, can be a badge of great honour but it can become a burden as some will take advantage of this noble characteristic. Therefore, making it clearly known when actions are being taken for protecting/saving or defending a person/position are taken, is arguably the best approach to take. Speaking up a bit more often can bring better recognition. This will benefit us in the workplace and in our relationships because there's a measure of our worth in these acts. Otherwise, the unsung hero just gets exploited.

Life saving roles can become the expected norm in certain environments & relationships. This leads to dependency. Just like in the military, using our resources to play out the hero role for sustained periods can be draining. So when the resources are eventually depleted, the only recognition received could be from those dependant on us, merely criticising when the life saving demands are not met!

On Duty
If we look at the military as an example. When the duties of soldiers working together in unison to better serve and protect each other in battle are shared. Swapping 'battle' for 'life' and soldiers for colleagues/partners or loved ones and adopting a military mindset for taking on tough challenges in life, we can also better manage our resources. If we understand our strengths, we can adopt the role needed to pull the group through in times of need. Likewise, if we have a partner that has the resources available when we are down - knowing that role can be taken to protect and hold the position for a time, means we've both got each other's backs.

I Got This!
We all have times when we're not performing at our best. Tired, hungry or stressed out - potential clashes in a relationship can create further distress and compound a difficult situation, especially if all concerned are below par. This is where the hero steps up!

This simple statement, 'I got this' - has had such an important impact on the health of our relationship. Using this phrase, has become adopted as part of our ongoing game of life and something which works wonders in all taxing encounters. My partner and I will recognise when a fraught situation is imminent and one of us will step-up and say 'I got this!'.

Firstly, what this means is that a game has been instated. This game scenario immediately diffuses the tension and can in itself be enough to pull one or both of us through. Secondly, it helps by self-rewarding the hero who has come forward. Thirdly, it calms the weakest in the group, because they know everything is taken care of until their resources are replenished once again. And lastly, it re-affirms the partnership because it's known that each is serving their duty to the other and confirmation there's always going to be someone watching their back!